A few months ago I was asked a question along the lines of “What are three things you value most in life/couldn’t do without?” It was during a group discussion for my leadership fraternity’s (Delta Omicron Zeta) rush event.

We went around the table and listened to everyone’s answers. A few of the common themes were family, friends, home, passion, involvement, food (!!!), and so on.

I thought of family and friends. Mhmm, definitely couldn’t live without them. My culture cropped up in between those thoughts. Missed those Indian gulab jamans (basically “warm sugary balls”, as my friend ever-so-affectionately described them the other day). Food. God, I LOVE food. Cheese. Grilled cheese. Then I started to think of my philanthropic involvement, my love of reading and writing, all things art, economic development…and from there I wandered over to pondering whether I should begin looking for an internship this summer.

From the midst of my muddled up mind, when it came to be my turn, this is what came out: sense of self.

“I don’t ever want lose my sense of self. I love the fact that I can just be. I’m happy in my own company and more importantly, comfortable with it. That’s why I don’t understand when people say they’re bored just sitting in their rooms. If you’re bored, it either means you’re a boring person or you don’t understand yourself very well. Sure, I couldn’t live without my friends, but I couldn’t live without knowing myself first either.”

Haha, probably not in those exact words.

One thing I see that bothers me sometimes, especially when it’s one of my friends, is the need to be dependent on someone else. Everyone wants companionship, but in my honest opinion, you have to be 100% strong before you let someone else into your life. You can’t want a guy with you every night and then fall into a pit of self-confidence issues when he leaves and go out looking for more guys to take you out of that pit, and then let them drop you right back in. You need to get rid of the pit, period. Okaaay, don’t know if that’s the best analogy (made sense in my head, haha). And I see it all the time. 

I’m not saying that I totally know myself and I’ve got it all figured out because god knows I don’t. But hey, I try :)

1. Grow some balls.

2. Just go for it.

3. Who cares what happens?

4. Life goes on.

5. Okay, you might care (but just for a little bit).

6. Life really does go on.